Megan and Jacob started dating when I was taking my figure drawing class. She has such a beautiful face. She allowed me to take pictures of her so I could make drawings of her throughout the semester. They don't really look like her or do her justice but I loved studying her face.
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
My mother got married quickly because it was during the war and her husband, Art Gilbert couldn't get a job at the high school as the football coach unless he was married. She had no wedding dress, reception, honeymoon, fancy presents or any kind of hoopla. I think she was always sad about that. But I think my favorite part of this story is that later on, her younger sister, Bobette--the bride in the above picture, had the whole hoopla. Mother never once expressed any sort of jealousy or resentment toward Bobette, getting all the fun things she missed as a young bride. I loved her for that. I think that was one of her best qualities--the ability to accept life as it came and move on without feeling sorry for herself. And then not resent others for having what she didn't. Una, the first one on the right, sewed a lot of the brides dresses and sewed Bobette's wedding dress. Don't you love the flowers at the waist? Mother is the third one in on the right.
Saturday, June 23, 2007
I love this photo. It was taken when my mother was only a teenager but she looks so more mature than that. How she loved clothes. You can tell just from this photo because she has a matching bow in her hair. Someone must have made this outfit for that to happen. Una, her sister, was evidently an amazing seamstress and sewed all the time for her sisters. I hope mother shows up for Ann's wedding.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
These hooked mother images are so much smaller than my hooked rugs. It becomes so intimate. I can cradle the whole image in my hand as I work. I am enjoying the change from six feet to just inches. They finish up so much more quickly. I wonder about size and the different statements that makes. With my rugs you need to step back but with these images they draw you close. Maybe that is what I am doing, trying to see my mother better, closer. Am I trying to understand where I came from?
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
This photo dropped off my big white board yesterday and I took the moment to just stare at it for awhile. Always my favorite part are my DARK SOCKS with my very practical brown shoes. My mother always made me wear dark socks, or when I was older, wear my dad's reject socks, because they didn't show the dirt. This is my neighbor, Kathy Bateman Petersen. She is an artist also. We pretty much had the same temperaments and got along, despite the fact she was a couple of years older than me. Her family was always so exotic to me because they would leave and live in places I had never heard of. And her mom would make homemade chocolates.I didn't know any mothers at the time but hers that made homemade chocolates. I thought she must live in Heaven on Ash Avenue. She had a big apple tree in her front yard and it was so big and fat you didn't have any problems, no matter how little you were, climbing up the limbs. We would sit there for hours and eat Popsicles in the summer on her limbs. I mean we would just sit there for hours on those limbs. That is about the best childhood I can think of.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
My mother images continue. I am wondering when they will stop. Maybe never. This is my first lithograph. I really can't claim I did it other than drawing on the stone. My professor, Wayne Kimball prepared the stone and did all the printing. It was a class project on hypnotism. So why the mother image? Mothers have such control over us in so many respects. You care so much what they think not only about you but how they approach life. Most children rebel against that when they are teenagers but I never did and rebelled at a later age, when I had children running around. I remember the exact day when I finally grew up and disagreed with my mother and challenged her authority over me. Our relationship was different from that day and much better, actually.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Jordan has always been passionate about beauty and sensitive to life and its subtleties. I love the way she expresses the depths of her feelings through words. In this rug she is holding two things: the Tree of Life and flowers. I know she feels deeply about both, her love of God and her sensitivity to her environment, not only physically but spiritually combining both worlds. Jordan, thank you for adding more passion to my world!
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Here are all three together. The colors of the man and the woman are combined into the center image. This symbolizes that we will not reach the highest kingdom, living with God, without husband or wife and together you can partake of the tree of life, or experience the pure love of God. The more I study I am convinced that is the great mystery--the love of God. Why does it seem so veiled sometimes? I know it isn't because He doesn't show it but what is it that we do or don't do to block it? Sometimes we look to others to find it and sometimes we aren't disappointed but mostly we are because they are looking too. I think the great paradox is the more we try to reflect the light and love of God to others the more we feel it ourselves.
Friday, June 15, 2007
Here is the final image for my triptych. I understand my grandmother was very feisty and no nonsense. It was a harsh and difficult existence in the desert in those days. She is holding bread and milk. This of course has direct correlation to the Savior as the bread of life and receiving milk without price. But the spiritual always correlates to everyday life if we are sensitive to that so it also reminds me of the supper my father always enjoyed--hot milk with bread. I guess his mother fixed that at times and was surely one of those comfort foods for him. So she represents that part of nurturing every mother does by feeding those she loves, such a beautiful type of the Savior. The pomegranate is a universal symbol of fertility and offspring. It is also interesting that sacrifice can bring forgiveness of sin. So we become as the Savior when we sacrifice and sins are washed away.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
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This is the center piece of the triptych representing the Savior and the sacrifice of the Lamb. The red symbolizes His return to earth for the Millenium. The tree is the Tree of Life with the roots coming from the Savior. The idea of pushing it outside the boarder again signifies Eternal Life, or life with God, away from the earthly bondaries of mortality. The triangle is a powerful symbol of the Godhead and the fact they are one.
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
This is part of a triptych I did for a show at the BYU Museum. I was studying sacrifice at the time and wanted to somehow visually represent what was in my head. I felt good about these pieces and was influence at the time with the Gee's Bend exhibit of African American quilters from Alabama so I enjoyed using their idea of free form, especially around the edges. This represents my grandfather on my father's side, Joseph William Clark, who owned a furniture store in Mesa and was very successful. He had given a lot of people credit that never paid him. He was angry about this and held alot of resentment to those people we didn't meet this obligation. He finally realized he needed to repent and forgive those that had taken advantage of him. He called my father and asked him if he wanted to see a $10,000.00 fire. He gathered the bills and threw all of them to the flames and then contacted all those that owed him money and told them their debt was forgiven. I don't think that solution is in any business classes these days but for him it was a part of a sacrifice he felt he needed to make. He was born in 1865 and died in 1948, before I was born. Can you imagine living in Arizona without airconditioning? This is what they faced as they went to that then VERY barren country.
Monday, June 11, 2007
To be blessed with a child that has had faith since she was little and never waivered in that faith is like asking for sugar to heal cancer. I know it is a gift and I wonder what Katy was like before she came here. She is calm but more than that she is faithful. I like that better than calm because faithfulness implies work on her part and not just genetics. Her faithfulness becomes the light she holds up so those around her have a clearer view of the Savior. Thanks Katy for helping me see Him a little better.
Saturday, June 9, 2007
I had a lot in common with my sister Carol. I am sad she is gone. She was twenty years older than I was, enough older I could have been her daughter. After she had her stroke she took me by the hand and said if she doesn't recover the use of her hands completely I would have to be the organist and she would be the artist. I told her that would never work! It is only recently that I realized we had a very thick common thread; we are both poets, she with words, mine is visual. This is a very big discovery for me. I mean really big. It helps me understand why I will never be good at so many things like balancing check books, being a secretary (my dad's suggested profession), CEO of McDonalds, Real Estate Agent, etc. This rug has her poem around the edge: If I came to earth to watch and sit I'd be wasting the cherry and eating the pit. I never saw Carol eat the pit, not even a nibble. But that is why being a poet is a great journey--you learn that pits are necessary but you don't dwell on the hard stuff. Poets interpret the past. I read a quote that said poets are prophets, not of the future but the past. I like that because I am always thinking about what happened and why and how should I react. This rug is of Adam and Eve right before Eve partakes of the fruit. It is that decision of should we just sit in this lovely garden with no children, no stress, no fighting, no diapers, no tears, no getting a baby sitter, and especially no joy or should we partake of the fruit and experience all of those things. Boy am I glad she had the courage to make that decision for children are the cherries, without them it is the pits!
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Ashley always had the ability to see things in a fresh way but also in a practical way. Everyone kids her because she always says, don't buy it, you could make that! But I like her spiritual eyes. She is able to see the good in everyone and ignore the bad. I did her hands extra big on this rug because her hands are gifted. She creates unusual things with her hands. I also see a great deal of service rendered with those same hands. She verbalizes her sensitivity with her hands through helping those around her. I am grateful to be a recipient of that service.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
July 1, 1954
When everyone was little I couldn't even possibly imagine you as adults. You pretty much can't see beyond the laundry, meals, cleaning the floor, making sure homework is done, the piano is practiced, talks ready for church, always needing new shoes, making sure you weren't killing each other, well you get the picture. Now you are all adults. Wow. When did that happen? or when I was in the thick of it, why didn't it happen sooner! Such a paradox of feelings--missing the wrestling on the bed at night and blowing in your face to make you gasp or feeding you lemons just to see your face react, being relieved when there were no more diapers or drinking bottles and happy you could dress yourself.
It is difficult being a woman. You feel things on a different level, not more significant, just different. You look at life differently and your emotions and your body, often push you in directions you didn't want to go. Your body becomes the vehicle that sometimes drives you over edge. Your body is also the vehicle that feels the spirit and gives you the unbelievable ability to guide and direct your family, to give unconditional love when you thought you had none. Your body helps you maintain a family emotionally as well as physically. As hard as it is, I love being a woman. I love being emotional about stupid things and about important things. I love getting all worked up. I love feeling a baby inside of me. I love the actual, physical reality of giving birth. I love the smell of a baby next to my breast. So despite the often betrayal of my body, I love being a woman.
Monday, June 4, 2007
One of my favorite stories of Jacob is when at only three years old he learned "I So Glad When Daddy Comes Home." He would sing the whole song right on pitch, clap his hands, puts his arms around his neck, and hug close! I am just sad we didn't have a video camera so you would all believe me that he actually did this. Jacob and his posterity will be a part of an "unbroken chain" of righteousness, thus the chain around this rug. I can't think of a better promise. He has the gift of charity which is that one gift the Lord commands us to seek after with "all energy of heart." I am grateful for his gentle nature that will surely bless all those that know him.